ġakbu sfi*o – il-bollettino della sfi*a

We didn’t really invite this bloke he just submitted his stuff and we feel obliged to print it. If only for the sake of superstition. For a long time his blog was much, much more popular than J’accuse (and probably still is even though he’s gone AWOL for what seems to be an eternity). Il-Bollettino della Sfi*a began in 1999 in the form of a series of newsletters  exchanged by email between Master studies students in Valletta, Bruges and Malta. Sfi*o brought it to the blogging world in August 2004. Bear with the guy, his Maltese is not exactly modern and he has a few problems and fixations…..

Scideu il chahda ia bloggeira tale nithadditchem. Le nista nemmen liema avveniment bombasticu mahsub min sid dan il blogg uassalna sabiesc nohorgu mill-ueghda ta’ silentiu illi chonna ilna nosservau b’dedittioni assoluta. Hasseina pero illi naghmlu present u nsemmghu lehen l’ispavaldi bhalna illi chatt ma cedeu ghal assediu costanti u incredibbli ta’ l-inservienti ta’ dich il cahba bendata. Ma nafsc chemm minnchom taphu biha. Ghaib ghalichom iecch m’ghandchomsc idea ta’ min hi u sc’taph taghmel cuando meno te l’aspetti. Sci cummidianti primi isibuha bhala “Donna Fortuna”. Psatas. Inioranti. Maleducati. U sfi*ati. Ahna insibuha bhala l-omm imscaitna ta’ chull event li int ma tistiecsc li iigri imma iigri sciorta. Siniuri nippresentaulchom is-sors ta’ chull dueiiach, ta’ chull malann u sors indirett ta’ chull daugha li zzarzar mal-curiduri. Nippresentaulchom l-omm li ggialna nitchellmu hasin u l-omm li tobbligana ingorru amuleti u controamuleti. nippresentaulchom l-iSfi*a.

U ahna servienti taghcom chonna u ghadna investigaturi u chronisti ta’ eventi fein hi tolchot bl-eghmil taghha. Ghalhecc il-Bollettin jintebagh biss chull mita uihed ierdeu. L-istatistica turi illi din is-sena hia uahda sfi*ata immens. Ghasc il-hidma taghha chien bla uachfien. Tidhcusc. Titilghusc fuc sci fessbuch jew tuitter u tiftahru b’chemm tacghu ghan neich. Gharfu min issa l-pericolu li tintaghrsu maghha. Ghasc hi ma ddahachsch imma tbicchi. U allura ahna, mill-isuali u curiduri tar-redattioni bollettinescha fein iingabru l-iprem sfinchronisti ta’ l-istoria ricenti nistacsu: Sc’il-cuccuttlu hemm x’ticcelebra li ghalact 7 snin tibbloggja? Sc’minghalih dan Zammit? Iaph l-autur ta’ din il-blog liema nessi occulti u semiotici ghandha in-numru seba’ fost il-cabbali universali? Sc’il cahba irid iishet? Bloggosfera shiha?

Ser ichollna allura nghaddu ghal mantra importanti u nitlobchom f’din is-siegha tinghacdu mieghi f’mantra li tbieghed u tbezzgha lill forzi tal-cahba bendata. Nittamau li tchun bizzeiied. Minfloch detto del giorno (DDS) ser naghtichom haunecch it-talba tal-isphi*at. Lissnuha ghaitu, anchi iecch hemm sci hadd hdeichom (scorta ma tistghusc tacghu ichtar ghan neich milli ga uachaitu)….

It-talba ta’ l-isphi*at

Jiena (INSERT NAME HERE) nigbed leiia chull siech ta’ fenech, gozz ta’ bzar ahmar niexeph, ghain ta’ dghaisa mitluqa f’marsasclocch, chrun tal-landa, baid tal-barri, pubu ta’ tphaila vergni, gharac ta’ serial harrai u amuleti ohra ecc. ecc. illi bi sperantia li iahdmu fuchi ghal tul din is-sena u chiph ucholl fuch l-ahua tieghi fi tbatia li iacsmu mieghi l-eteru nittama u nispera chif ucholl (without pushing my luck too far) nimmagina ser ibarrdu lis-sinioria taghha il-cahba bendata u l-inservjenti taghha u izommuhom fi stat ta’ coma ghal hin bizzeiied sabiesc iissorvolau l-esistenta inutli tieghi u iacbdu ma sci hadd iehor.

Ninitima minn issa il-famusissimi boscla sciaten, mortacci loro, familii ta’ paternità u/jew maternità sconosciuta u l-povri eruieh tal-porgatorio illi iista iaghti l-cas illi (f’kas ta’ nuqqas ta’ efficacia tas-susesposta talba) iigu inondati u importunati b’imprecattioniiet adatti u proportionali ghal chull deni illi iista (barraminnfuchna) iincala.

Seuua? Prosit lil chulhadd ta’ dan l-avveniment gustus. Hadt gost nara haphna phostchom illi chienu ucholl carreiia regolari. Nittama li dacht nergghu nibdeu scogholna fuch il-bollettin. Ghadna nistenneu pero li titnehha sahta illi intbaghtet minn incarnattioni tad-dea bendata lio tghisc geuua Milan.

a bien tot

Gakbu S.

DDS

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