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J'accuse: Signs of Times

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This article and accompanying Bertoon appeared in today’s edition of The Malta Independent on Sunday.

If I had to engage in a silly exercise of anthropomorphising months – ascribing human features to months – I believe that September would have much to say about the way she has been treated. It has to be a she, because as horoscopic enthusiasts and dabblers would tell you, for most of the month the star sign to follow is Virgo. Which is not to say that I willingly engage in the logically faulty statement that “all virgins are women” but rather that I am going along with what I believe to be the general first impression of Virgo as normally pictured on the side of horoscopes – a lovely maiden pure. It was either that or have the irritatingly ever-smiling face of Richard Branson who has now become unredeemably associated with the word Virgin. So… back to September. She has been with us for some time now and has brought the gusts of wind, the first challenges to the festival weather and most of all, she has brought remembrances of all sorts. Yes, that’s because every day in September now reads like some form of lotto extraction, although this time it’s not an international form of the Italian “smorfia” (linking dreams to numbers) but a panoply of historic and not-so historic events that are fast clogging up the seventh month of the Roman calendar.

Chronos (Time)

In Malta we’ve had 8/9 as a reason to celebrate a multiplicity of victories for quite some time now, so there’s nothing new there. Then came 1964 and we added another day for remembrance’s sake – that was 21/9. It goes without saying that the latest addition to the days of the ninth month (current reckoning) for remembrance purposes is 9/11. You have to forgive the Americans for putting the cart before the horse and the month before the day, but hey, they have to be different (that way we can tell them apart from the English in good war movies) so “nine-eleven” it is. You will not need reminding what all that was about – especially with the revival of conspiracy theories come every anniversary.

As if that was already not enough, this year we had to contend with an epochal occurrence. Ladies and gentlemen, last Wednesday was the ninth day of the ninth month of the ninth year of the 21st century. Or, as the number-happy crowd would have it, “09.09.09”. I know that it could sound like an unhappy German who just spilt all his coffee all over him (“Oh nein!, Oh nein!, Oh nein! – bad joke I know) but this kind of numerical occurrence does have magic for some people.

Now had we been in the sixties, when the fixation with the number of the devil was still rife, we would be expecting some barmy idiots clamouring the “upside down end of the world” because 9.9.9 is also 6.6.6. spun through 180 degrees. We are not in the sixties, although the Beatles are shooting back up the charts thanks to a wonderful marketing scheme, which meant that the masterfully redigitised complete Beatles collection would be reissued on 09/09/09. Inevitably, this has meant that the Fab Four have once again got a huge success on their hands. Let’s see who will be trying to play “Eleanor Rigby” backwards on their Blue Ray player this time around.

Zephyrus (West Wind)

September. Poor September. The children are getting ready to go back to school and we will stop holding our breath for the real news to happen. Those living in Malta actually get some form of a reprieve and live September as a gigantic hesitant kick-start to the winter routine. In France, they already have enough on their hands, what with Great Escapes by murderers (who fashioned a cardboard box and hid in it until the delivery men came along) and a candidate for the most hopeless international football coach EVER.

When it comes to records, Signor Berlusconi is raising the stakes in Italy too. Never one to shy away from big statements, Silvio is not content with the naysaying aimed at all the ever-increasing number of detractors. Il Cavaliere has now moved on to declaring that he is by far the greatest prime minister that Italy has had in its 150 years of republican history. His latest claim to fame is that he has even outlived the famous Alcide De Gasperi’s government – so in his mind he definitely deserves his inscription in the Olympian Halls of Italian Political Fame.

A year ago around this time, Silvio the Great Leader could be counted among the leaders of the free world who were hit by an incredible event that changed the world as they knew it. Not even all the entrepreneurial acumen of the self-proclaimed greatest statesman Italy has ever seen could foresee the oncoming economic miasma. Lehmann Brothers, Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac – the collapse happened suddenly and fast. If you recall, this time last year, as we prepared to return to the normal routine of work after our August vacations, thousands of employees found themselves walking the streets with carton boxes full of their office belongings.

The economy collapsed and the cocksure certainty of the snazzy traders and bankers of Wall Street and Co. suffered a blow from which they are still to recover. With hindsight it does not seem half as bad as the doomsday predictions that started to circulate 12 months ago – at least it does not feel that bad. Have we been cushioned? Were we told to expect the worst in order to be able to manage what actually hit us? The big question is really whether we are now equipped to read the signs of our times.

Hemera (Daylight and Sun)

On Thursday night I had a Cabinet dinner as one of the three original référendaires of the Maltese Cabinet at the ECJ left us to return to work in the UK. As I drove to the city centre for my appointment at the evergreen Chiggeri restaurant I remembered that the Luxembourg government had announced that, for that evening, shops could remain open until nine in the evening. This kind of occasion is quite a godsend and most residents of the capital hope that this type of extension occurs more often.

Shops in Luxembourg close at six in the evening on a normal shopping day. The closing time is adhered to with a religious discipline, and woe betide any late shopper doing the rounds at ten to six – to the point that you begin to wonder whether most of the shops actually want your custom. The possibility of extending opening hours might have something to do with the economic crisis, or it might have something to do with Luxembourg catching up with the rest of the developed world in the field of retail economics. In any case, having this kind of choice for longer could do a world of good to most office workers.

It is when you see these rigid, nonsensical practices that you remember how good it is back home, where the shopkeeper will not hesitate to keep the shutters open a while longer. Keep that in mind the next time a narrow-minded northerner throws some absurd comment about us southern peoples wanting to live the easy life and not working an hour too many!

Gaia (Earth)

This week I was reminded of the whole debacle on the Valletta UNESCO status (Times of Malta gaffes included) when reading an interesting article about the island of Skellig Michael that is situated just off the southwestern tip of Ireland. The island contains some of the most mystifying remains of the early Christian era. It was a bit of a coincidence to be reading about Skellig Michael since it was only last week that my better half and I took to watching Kenneth Clark’s Civilisation TV series made for the BBC in the early sixties.

In the very first episode of the series (astonishing how old it looks now), Clark gets off a boat and onto the isle of Skellig Michael to remind his viewers how this was the last refuge of the Christians from an otherwise cold Europe being ravaged by what he likes to call “barbarians”. Skellig Michael, a UNESCO World Heritage Site since 1996, was the subject of a recent UNESCO review. The report, intended to investigate “archaeological mistakes” that were allegedly being made in the restoration of the monastic enclosures, found that “the structures had indeed been rendered dramatically different” by the restoration work.

The danger of losing UNESCO status is one incentive to not dabble too much with historical heritages – although I will be the first to admit that I am not even one hundredth as competent as anyone in the two camps debating the best way to treat such heritage. On the one hand some advocate preservation through intervention, while others favour leaving structures untouched for future investigators. Come what may, the UNESCO reviews remain one of the international reference points of quality.

Last year, the German city of Dresden was stripped of its World Heritage Status for allowing a motorway to destroy its skyline. The only other place to have been stripped of its status was an antelope sanctuary in Oman where the government itself had renounced its status. An Economist article entitled “The limits of soft cultural power” examines the strengths and weaknesses of the UNESCO system in ensuring proper conversation of what we consider to be world heritage. The UNESCO system is actually criticised by some for being too considerate of state sensitivities but remains the best reference point beyond national borders.

Nyx (Night)

A final loose word from the sporting world. This week can only be remembered as the week when the cheats came home. In Formula One racing, Nelson Piquet Jr admitted to having voluntarily crashed his Renault car in order to favour the stable favourite Fernando Alonso. In athletics, the 800m women’s running champion Caster Semenya is at the centre of a whirlwind because scientific tests have proven that the runner is a hermaphrodite. That would explain the high levels of testosterone levels that she has – although the South African Athletics Federation is threatening to go to war on this issue, believing that Semenya is not wrong in wishing to compete in her category.

In the UK, the multimillionaire giants of English football are shaking at their foundations after Chelsea’s two-window ban from transfers for having illegally obtained the services of a player when still a minor. Big name clubs like Man U and Arsenal are likely to follow, as FIFA tightens its grip on the leeches who profit from other clubs’ diligence in rearing new football wonders. In my time in Luxembourg, I have made friends with a person in charge of the educational side of a football academy in neighbouring Metz and I have witnessed first hand the anger and frustration of seeing a boy wonder being literally stolen without proper compensation being paid for the hard work.

Unfortunately, the week of cheating also had a little stop on our shores. Marsaxlokk FC, which only recently rose to the pinnacle of Maltese football, descended back into the second tier of national soccer after the MFA (belatedly, very belatedly) ruled against them on a bribery charge. That’s two teams from the upper echelons found guilty of bribery this year – which is a pity, seeing the good showing of our national team in international matches. On the other hand, when one remembers what Italy got out of its calciopoli scandal, that might just be the medicine to incentivise us for future victories.

Aristaeus (Hunter)

And finally Aristaeus the Hunter. Shrewd readers will notice that, for professional reasons, J’accuse cannot and will not comment on the ECJ decision regarding Malta’s decision to allow hunting in the years 2004 to 2007 (inclusive). That was the decision, however, and the FKNK press releases came closest to deciphering what the consequences of such a decision are.

That was the week that was. A weird one if you ask me, but then again it might just be the settling back and putting the souvenirs of Sicily and Malta in the background. Last night did not help much – a good bistecca fiorentina washed down with good Sicilian wine at La Follia in Weiler-La-Tour where the sommelier Carmelo is a Sicilian Maltophile who will make anybody feel at home. Here’s to the next one…

Jacques is back to blogging regularly at www.jacquesrenezammit.com/jaccuse. If you know what Gigi D’Agostino and Stretch have in common, then J’accuse is the place to be.

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