This article and accompanying Bertoon appeared in today’s edition of The Malta Independent on Sunday.
Yoshida Kogyo Kabushikikaisha
Now that’s quite a mouthful of a name and I doubt many readers would be familiar with it. If I were to limit my tease to the initials YKK I am quite sure that faint flares of recognition will be sparking somewhere in your brain cells allocated to memory and familiarity. You’ve seen it before, time and time again, so it must be something you see or do regularly. Now where could you have heard of this “YKK” before?
It’s Ferragosto (for any queries on that moniker see last year’s article) so I’ll spare you any further intra-cranial efforts that might waste the valuable energy necessary to lift you off the deckchair and walk those five odd steps to the sea. YKK or (Yoshida Kogyo Kabushikikaisha) is by far the world’s largest producers of that ubiquitous item present on clothing apparel and carrier bags known to most of the world as the zip or zipper.
The company philosophy at YKK is “The Cycle of Goodness” which means that one prospers when one renders benefit to others. Which is quite an apt philosophy for this article which was never intended to be an essay on zips but rather one on our fixation with prices and costs – particularly in this the period of travel. I only got to YKK while researching online tips on travelling and examining the pros and cons of different styles of suitcase (including considerations on whether the zipper on aforementioned suitcase is “chain” or “lock”). In order not to have wasted too much of the research time let me give you this tip: if a suitcase manufacturer opts for an anonymous brand of zips rather than world famous names (read YKK) then you may be sure (almost) that it is a cost cutting exercise and not an effort to improve quality. Caveat emptor.
Inglorious (Gozitan) Basterds
Caveat emptor. That’s the one. It was inevitable that in the summer that followed the peak of the economic recession,the annual compare-the-market (not meerkat) fest that exists ever since some Mancunian workers (early post-industrial revolution) packed their bags and caught the train down to the seaside would be at its harshest. I came across a stomach-churning series of comments beneath an online Times article that had originally pointed out that Gozitan businessmen were pinning their hopes on the Santa Maria weekend for an upturn in their business.
New statistics this month point out that the recession may be over surprisingly early in France and Germany. Not in Gozo though. In the island alternately ruled by the Refalos and Debonos (much to the chagrin of the puppets at Castille, Pietà and Hamrun), the recession is still a cause of concern among the businessmen. The restaurant and hotel owners are still waiting for their share of the recovery and therefore Santa Maria seems to be the right time for some money to flow in their direction. What they did not count on was the Maltese backlash – or maybe that is too unkind and generic – it’s more like the rabble of semi-literate commentators and their anecdotal pieces of advice to the Gozitan business community.
It’s the same old tune and it’s there – recession or no recession. I’m sorry if my true blood might not allow me to view the matter in an unbiased manner but what most of these comment droppers want is a free lunch. That is not to say that Gozo does not have its fair share of scoundrels and thieves (and tax scroungers) but I’d hazard a guess that it’s not above the average in the dog-eat-dog society of capitalist civilisation. As for the tax scrounging business just look at the millions of VAT money fraud currently the subject of an investigation – not your standard Gozitan tax breaker now is it?
Truth is that it is all a matter of prejudiced perception. We often see it in this paper when the bard from Bidnija develops random bouts of contumelious attacks on Gozitans in general. We have been accused of something equivalent to omertà, of bestiality, of ignorance and more. And it’s not just from the columns of this paper. There’s something that clicks in the collective subconbscious of the substantial mass of anti-Gozitans whenever a mention is made of the “sister island”. Sister my back side…
Beyond the Berlin Channel
The prejudice is written in block capitals all over the place. The approach to Gozo is the same as the approach to Eastern European countries in the early nineties. I’m sure you remember those people who would go to Moscow, Prague, Budapest etc and come back with stories of the “bargains” to be had – label jeans for a tuppence, cheap food and more. The “natives”, “aboriginals”, “indigenous peoples” were a golden duck (sic – from Times comments) to be mocked (Jeez – they are worse off than us under Mintoff) and ridiculed. Little did it strike their petty minds that the reason underpinning their trip east was not to discover the majestic beauties of the colossal cities they visited but rather to get their cheap travel bargain on the shoestring budget they could afford.
Rather than goose that laid the golden egg, I would say that the Visegrad countries were a sitting duck for exploitation and have only just recovered (thankfully) from that period. Now back in Malta there are still people who travel to Gozo with that “plunder the unemancipated peasant” mentality. They’ve been doing so for ages and still expect to find the gbejna, the ftira tal-maxokk and the garage to convert for a family of twenty-two for the price of a Catch chocolate bar. Worse still – they do this as a “favour” to their “brothers” on the “sister island” – as I was brusquely told in the comment section: “iddardarx l-ilma li tixrob minnu” (don’t bite the hand that feeds you). Funny, the only other time I heard that is from irritating, presumptious and misinformed Luxembourgers who believe that their Government is somehow responsible for my eurosalary.
For heaven’s sake… when was the last time these people walked into an establishment in Malta and expected the vendor to grovel in thankful appreciation after they purchased a twenty cent chocolate bar? I can picture their fantasy already. With tears rolling down his cheeks and struggling to hold back a bear hug, the Gozitan entrepreneur thanks them profusely for their generous, unsolicited custom and whispers “Thank you for buying the three pastizzi, I can give my daughter a real education now and my son can stop tending the sheep. Here, have another one, it’s on the house.”
Dirt Cheap
If they are not given the quality service for below the average prices then these philanthropists on a mission see red. It does not help one bit that they often encounter the not too rare Gozitan who is attempting to make a quick buck with no worry about the long-term loss of custom. But really, does that just happen in Gozo? Not. Idiots with no idea or economic acumen as to how to gain a constant flow of custom exist everywhere. That is how capitalist society works and those who do not play by the rules of supply and demand die out fast.
Feel free to report the overpricing snack bar that charges 5 euros for a bottle of water but don’t blame a whole island for your experience. Don’t expect accomodation in a farmhouse in Gozo to cost anything less than in Sicily, Corfu or Crete… why should it anyway? Yes, in most countries it is the norm to establish a minimum one week booking during the peak holiday period. As for the geezer who claims to have paid 12€ for a return ticket to a “top destination in Italy” without considering, fees for buying online ticket (you HAVE to pay by credit card and there is a charge for paying by credit card – how’s that for cheap?), fees for your suitcase, taxes, fees for check-in and the ancillary costs during travel … well, what can I say… the joke’s on you.
In the end it boils down to the good old adage – there is no such thing as a free lunch. I am aware that there are crooked businessmen everywhere and in the end it is a discerning customer who can do the trick. If you don’t like it don’t go there but do save us the pontification and comments infused with inexplicable prejudice – and horribly bad English. It does say something that the comment section under the reported article is a veritable treasure trove of twisted expressions and broken English.
There was L. Galea who “made an inquiry”, a Paulette Xerri who has a love affair with the letter “i” (“unfortunitly”, “livlihood”), a Galea L. who believes that Gozitans “skin Maltese people alive”, a C.Agius who offered me the interesting idea of banning all Maltese from Gozo, there’s Ernie Grima who laughs in caps (LOL) and small letters (lol) in the same breath and believes that Gozitans “better stick to farming and fishing”, and of course there is Joseph Camilleri who defies the laws of science when he claims that “We haved (sic) lost the duck that lays the Golden Duck (double sic)”. Now ain’t that a wonderful bunch to be dispensing advice to their “brethren” in Gozo?
Clones Apart
The quick buck has been a nirvana for many a businessman and woman. Again. Nobody gives anything away for free – so yes, caveat emptor. I read about a local business which closed shop for a summer recess never to open its doors again. It was famous for its bargains on TV prices and other household goods – another favourite among the burgeoning philanthropist Maltese community. Rumour has it that the owner went and did a runner after amassing debts with the exchequer and not before defaulting on a number of creditors and clients. Funny how he’s not a Gozitan really – would have fit the stereotype to a T.
In the US the mega-company Best Buy announced an online sale on 32″ HDTVs for $9.99. It was a typo that was quickly corrected by the company when it was flooded by purchase requests. This did not stop hundreds of consumers expecting to receive the product all the same – which only goes to show that the unreasonable consumer is not simply a gold duck hunting Maltese stereotype.
Sicula Siculorum
It’s not a typo. It’s my play on the Latin name for Sicily and the expression meaning for ever and ever. I’m off to the island of the Trinacria and land of il Commissario Montalbano. I booked a farmhouse for one week at a reasonable price. It was not strange to see the owner expect that I book for a minimum of one week considering the peak period. I hope that my research into the restaurants of the area will prove useful when choosing between the thief and the honest businessman but then again I don’t intend to ruin my holiday by going all sour because of the odd, inevitable, negative experience.
I hear it rained this morning (Friday). Let’s hope it does not ruin the weekend for whoever opts to spend a good time in Gozo. I know it’s a fantastic stay because whenever I send foreign colleagues over from the institutions I always get the same feedback. They love Malta, what with all its chaos and disorganisation (yes, it looks disorganised after OCD perfect Luxembourg) but they always have a sparkle in their eye when they describe their favourite part of the experience – “aaaah Gozo…. marvellous…. we have to spend more time there next time.”
Surely they must have found the “Golden Duck”… pity about the hopeless bus system though!
The J’accuse Sicily/Malta trip has kicked off in earnest. You might find www.jacquesrenezammit.com/jaccuse rather dormant at the moment. No worries we’ll be back by the 21st!
