The heat of the summer and the explosive events have not detracted the team at MaltaToday (MT) from their persistence in turning the Nikki Dimech saga into another interwoven epic of a conspiracy theory. The state funeral of one of Malta’s most respected politicians and the Mosta fireworks bang spoilt the plans for the MT team who were probably counting on the boring period of Santa Maria to sell the conspiracy spin to the utmost. Lest you think we are about to make a full mockery of the MT news item regarding the goings on around the latest local councillor to be declared incompetent we beg you to hold your equines for a little longer.

The story as recounted by the eager wolves of MT is definitely more intriguing (and almost twice as credible) as the news coming from the sheep at Strickland House’s HMV (His Master’s Voice – known in some circles as the Times of Malta). First we had the allegations of illicit behaviour and financial misdemeanours at the Sliema local council. So far, so good. As local councils go these days financial embezzlement and general mishandling by those catapulted to the forefront of the local scene by the PLPN headhunters are becoming more and more commonplace. In this case it was young turk Nikki Dimech who was being investigated for a period of time. Things started to hot up when Nikki Dimech tried to organise an emergency council meeting to clear the air and demonstrated the unqualified naivety of an untutored renegade left up shit creek with no paddle and no organisational back up to speak of. Arrigo, his mentor in Sliema, was nowhere to be seen at this point and the spinmeisters at Dar Centrali kept their distance.

Dimech’s failed meeting did take place some time later only to turn out to be a doctored meeting that had nothing of the “emergency” air that had been trumpeted earlier. The heavy hand of party interference (or guidance?) could be felt at that point though to say that the Sliema councillors were comfortable with the situation at that point would be tantamount to saying that Sliema Wanderers will one day have good odds to win the Champions’ League. So Dimech’s robotic address at the meeting was registered on camera a few days before he was summoned to the police station to answer a few questions.

Which is where Dimech’s (and the PN’s) Midsummer’s Nightmare starts – and where MT begins its party. First it was announced ad urbi et orbi that Dimech was admitting his guilt and that he had solicited commissions from a contractor (an Arrigo supporter to boot) for some council works. Information is thrown at the reader like an unfinished novel. What importance, for example, is the fact that the contractor in question is a supporter of Arrigo (presumably this also means that he foots some bills in election time thanks to our lovely laws on party and candidate funding – whatever happened to the crime of lying on oath?)? The equation should have been – and is – Dimech is backed by Arrigo and hence should therefore be nice to Arrigo’s supporters. Iddardarx l-ilma etc etc…

Then there was the ploy of a frame-up with the collaboration of the men supposed to keep the law and order. Dimech’s friends (note: NOT DIMECH) were alleging that he was coerced to sign the confession and that such coercion included the denial of an all important inhaler. The police were the villains aiding an invisible hidden hand that had everything but the interests of Dimech to heart. Funny. Apart from the immediate police denials one would expect MT to ask Dimech himself whether his friends are being solidal out of disbelief or whether there was some truth in that story. Not really. Well so long as his friends say it.

Dimech in the meantime was holding on to his seat in the council. He refused to resign and stayed on as an independent councillor. Not many brownie points for someone who has just admitted his guilt to the men in uniform but since the law does not provide for his immediate impeachment then that got the PN in a twist. Our electoral laws do tend to get the PLPN in a twist in such situations since we do not really elect party people to councils or parliament but we directly choose our representatives. All the PN could do was Dimech from the party and take their distance which you can bet your bottom euro they did at the earliest opportunity. What was left was for the PN to get Dimech to let go of his mayoral post.

Which meant that Paul Borg Olivier had to reluctantly acknowledge that there is  more to local councils than preparing long lists of catch all candidates. He would have to leave the airconditioned office in Dar Centrali, postpone all trips on superyachts and meet the consiglieri. The point of all this meeting being of course the dismissal by vote of no confidence of Nikki Dimech from his mayoral post. MT’s investigative sleuths got wind of these meetings and were present at the Lady Di pub in Sliema when PBO met 72-year old Consigliera Sandra Camilleri.

As we learn in the article (Your mother or Nikki Dimech, Borg Olivier tells 72 year old councillor) , Madam Camilleri still enjoys the company of her own mother at the ripe age of 72. Don Paolo does not seem to manage to get Madam Camilleri away from the idea proposed by the “friends of Nikki Dimech” that there has been some sort of frame up. According to the journalist overhearing the conversation Camilleri sticks to the frame up idea rather obstinately and is reluctant to sign up to PBO’s plan to depose the tainted mayor. It is then that, according to MT, Don Paolo chooses to up the ante and comes up with a rather enigmatic phrase: “Your mother or Dimech”.

There is it is. A phrase reminescent of those Mafia style movies where the victim is told without any measure of equivocation that the life of another person depends on their making the right decision. It’s the classical offer they can’t refuse. But is it? The article in question is full of dropping of innuendos and includes a whole episode of PBO making a mockery of the councillor’s dedication to her agèd mama but surely the shady dealings of the PN inner sanctum do not include contract killings of aged women in old people’s homes (we presumed the latter fact). Premature termination of life cannot ever feature on the PN agenda – at least because it would be rather contradictory to the party line on abortion. So what did PBO mean with his offer? Even if we take the MT story with a pinch of salt (as you generally do since the MT does take to see the Sun or Daily Mail side of things) you are still left with a sort of hanging threat.

The only excuse we could think of was that PBO got miffed by Camilleri’s constant calls with her mother on mobile and that the phrase was an exhortation to concentrate on matters at hand: “Your mother or Dimech” sounds much less dangerous now. I sure as hell hope that  Paul can say that this is the case. Otherwise we really have gone to the dogs. I eagerly await the full version on the Sunday paper but in the meantime I really cannot shake the image of PBO and JP Debono as a PN version of Samuel Jackson and John Travolta sent on some business by Marcellus Wallace.

Pleasures yet to come eh?

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