Tag: traffic

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I.M. Jack : The one about the WYSINWYG

La Trahison des images (Ceci n'est pas une pipe). 1929. Oil on canvas, Overall: 25 3/8 x 37 in. (64.45 x 93.98 cm). Unframed canvas: 23 11/16 x 31 7/7 inches, 1 1/2 inches deep, 39 5/8 inches diagonal. Purchased with funds provided by the Mr. and Mrs. William Preston Harrison Collection (78.7).
La Trahison des images (Ceci n'est pas une pipe). 1929. Oil on canvas, Overall: 25 3/8 x 37 in. (64.45 x 93.98 cm). Unframed canvas: 23 11/16 x 31 7/7 inches, 1 1/2 inches deep, 39 5/8 inches diagonal. Purchased with funds provided by the Mr. and Mrs. William Preston Harrison Collection (78.7).
La Trahison des images (Ceci n’est pas une pipe). 1929. Oil on canvas,

It’s been a long time since we’ve had a quick I.M. Jack take on the major news items. The theme this week is about WYSINWYG or what seems to be the apotheosis of the governmental policy of What You See is NOT What You Get. This blog has for some time now described Muscat’s government’s actions in terms of Magritte’s “Ceci n’est pas une pipe” We are used to having this or that government representative exhort us to look for the facts beyond what our eyes can see – “what you see is not what really is” they seem to tell us. Thus the traffic clogging the sick arteries of our nation is just a question of perception, we only see lack of qualification in government appointees because we want to and the price of oil in Malta is actually cheap today if we consider that it could be cheaper in the future. Hence WYSINWYG – what you see is not what you get.

Will the real budget please stand up?

The speaker hath ruled. The real budget is not the one that was physically tabled in parliament or the one published on the government website. No the real budget is the one read by Minister Scicluna in fits and starts. The speaker’s ruling is actually an apotheosis of all that has been Taghna Lkoll until now. Do not believe the facts and figures. Only believe what we say. Anyway we have to make do with the new mantra of “genuine mistake” that seems to be as permissible with this lot as it was anathema with the previous lot.

We are genuinely mistaken

Such was the excuse when Minister Cardona once again committed a “genuine mistake” appointing a person from the bench to a government entity. The euphoria of appointments to this and that chair is such that sometimes the Ministers or their minions for whom they are directly responsible get carried away and end up signing up people who are not fit for the purpose. In this case such lack of fitness was not due to incompetence (that actually is allowed – just look at our ambassadorial appointments) but due to the fact that the person being re-nominated for a bit of the parastatal company gravy train had already been fit comfortably in the puzzle of judicial appointments – and judges and magistrates are not allowed to sit on government entities. Plus ça change.

Get him to the Greeks

Cuschieri junior is being nominated ambassador to Greece is he? And there was Tsipras thinking that he had faced his greatest challenge yet. This is the same Cuschieri whose position on the Greek debt crisis was largely influenced by very personal issues of whether or not he would be allowed to take up his seat in Strasbourg. “in the midst of the Greek bailout talks, Cuschieri called on Malta to deny the debt-afflicted state money under the EFSF lest they green-light the enlargement of the European Parliament.” (MaltaToday). Sweet isn’t it? What better man to send to Athens if not this genuine Floriana FC (and, alas, Juventus) fan?

What you did was very spiteful, but it was also very brave and very honest and I respect you for doing that. But the content of what you said has made me hate you. So there’s a layer of respect, admittedly, for your truthfulness, but it’s peppered with hate. Hateful respect. (Alduous Snow – Get Him to the Greek)

X Arab Bank

Peppi Azzopardi tried to act smart with the “patriots” of Malta. He must have reasoned that the chicken-brained reasoning that is normally spouted by intolerant bigots can be easily countered on his show. For my sins I watched the whole show on streaming. It was a disaster in many ways. It was once again a testimonial to the lack of civic education and by that I am not referring to the patriot’s lack of knowledge of the words of our national anthem. Take Peppi’s bold assertion that it is up to members of parliament to interpret the law – and that since a member of parliament has stated publicly that wearing the burqa is not illegal then so it is. Not it isn’t Peppi. Members of parliament form part of our legislative branch. They legislate. What they do not do is interpret. That is up to the courts to do. It’s part of this little game called separation of powers. You could be forgiven Peppi, with this government the whole concept of accountability and respect of the separation of powers is fast going up in smoke. We are left with a nation that is in search of its basic values and still trying hard to understand how the whole “liberal democracy” thingy works.

Labels

Labels tend to help us understand who we are and who our interlocutors are. It has become a common occurrence though to maliciously use labels for sweeping statements and assumptions. When an arab loses his mind in Paceville and goes on a stabbing rampage then it is a cue for “immigrants out” and for patriots to charge through Valletta or Birzebbugia like a bunch of oafs on a xalata. If an assembly of Croats and Serbs decide to re-enact part of the Balkan issues on St Rita Steps in Paceville the same reaction is not forthcoming. We have said it many a time: a crime is a crime is a crime – irrespective of who is committing it and irrespective of who the victim is. The confusion that results out of trying to define aggravations based on colour, race or gender (or lack thereof) of the aggressor or victim only serve to compound the melting-pot of intolerance that our country is fast changing into. We have now had news of a priest who was arrested on charges of pedophilia. Cue the hypocrite anti-frock crowd to once again come out en masse barking agains “the church”, “religion” or “priesthood”. What a load of bollocks. The crime would be a crime if the person accused were a plumber, a nurse, a footballer or whatever other profession you may think of. It is heinous, punishable and condemnable. What it is not is testimony that one particular profession is more prone towards it than others. Pointing fingers at “the church” is tantamount to accusing “arabs” after a Libyan goes on rampage in Paceville.

Traffic

It will never be solved. Not without a fascist unelected government of wise men and women. Only then could the Maltese “suffer” the imposition of a car-free island where most money is spent on an efficient common transport system. Reducing the car amount to a bare minimum can only be dreamt of so long as politicians pander to the perceived “needs” of a population that has been bred to be “hurt” (read: throw a tantrum) whenever it does not get what it wants.

Maybe that is why Taghna Lkoll fares so well among the Maltese. More often than not they are led to believe that they are getting what they always wanted – irrespectively of the fact that what they see is not actually what they had hoped for.

Of mankind we may say in general they are fickle, hypocritical, and greedy of gain. – Nicolo Macchiavelli

 

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J'accuse : Intemperate Winds

It’s a windy Sunday, or at least it’s supposed to be. That’s if the weatherman got his calculations right and a strong wind should have been blowing across the island since last night acting as a downright spoiler to whatever estival events you might have planned. For me that means that a boat trip with the extended family will not be taking place this afternoon and that I will have to forego the last visit to the various nooks and crannies of Comino and Gozo. To others, this ill wind scattering uninvited across the isles has meant a forfeit of an evening of melodic entertainment with Malta’s favourite musical son and Signor Cocciante.

Doubtless the anti-open theatre lobby will already be smirking and repeating the “I told you so” mantra about the usefulness of open air theatres and events in Malta. The crowing started earlier this week when the predicament of the European Baroque Orchestra showed up the limitations imposed by our humid environment on most instruments in open air. To be fair I did not really see the point of so much complaining when I sat through the splendidly set Midsummer Night’s Dream in the Argotti gardens (Bravo Globe Theatre people). While the occasional firework might have proven to be a slight distraction every now and then, the most distracting noise on the evening turned out to be a tiff between cats towards the end of the performance.

All this probably leaves a hung jury on the business of the pros and cons of outside performances at the end of the day although I am beginning to be convinced by the arguments favouring a revision of the City Gate plans to incorporate a roofed lot where the Opera House used to be.

Mistral

But back to the ill wind. It has been a splendiferous couple of days barring the couple of hours when the sweltering heat combined with the drenching humidity sufficed to send any reasonable man in tilt. I cannot stop singing the praises of some of Malta’s finest beaches – top among which must be Ghadira Bay. It might take a humungous effort of coordination and civic consciousness but the crystal waters and the absence of beach louts are enough to make you want to visit the beach again, again and again. Undoubtedly Malta’s best advert is Mother Nature herself.

Unfortunately we do not seem to be too keen on preserving the more natural side of the equation. It’s not just nature in the tree-hugging sort of sense. There are also more modern kinds of pollution that lead me to marvel at how tourists are not abandoning the islands in droves. Whatever happened, for example, to the rule/law of no major construction works in tourist areas in the summer months? Have the PLPN benefactors had their way again? Why does the man with the jackhammer still wake up anyone within listening distance of Church Street, Paceville at 8am and how does he walk away from his job after four hours daily of constant hammering. Does not prolonged use of a pneumatic drill turn a man into a human vibrator?

Another thing. Who, and with what divine inspiration, allowed the myriad cranes to apparate along the main thoroughfares of Paceville without so much of a by your leave? Paceville must be the only corner of Malta to witness 24-hour gridlock. The carefully planned (do you smell the sarcasm?) blockage of more parking spaces in Saint George’s Road (for Pender Place trucks to exit occasionally) must be second in uselessness only to the massive new “No Parking” footprint (at least six places) blocked out by the new boutique student harem/hotel known as The George. You would think that if new hotels come complete with underground parking they need not block a whole street of parking places.

Scirocco

Out on a boat trip on Friday (course reunion – never put 14 lawyers in one boat – which is why we used two) I could witness the growth and growth of the buildings along the coast from Valletta to Comino. Sliema is particularly impressive though not, obviously, to the levels of the Manhattan skyline that one can see on an evening trip on the New York Water taxi. A question that rings through your mind as you cruise along the beautiful waters is how much public land is dedicated to private building and foreclosed from public use. The saddest picture of them all must be the tiny tower dwarfed by a hotel in the Saint George’s Bay area. It yells for help surrounded by the walls of concrete – a fate soon to be shared by the tower at the end of Tigné Point.

One of my colleagues raised an interesting question regarding the foul smelling tuna farms. Technically speaking the area of the sea in which these tuna farms are kept is public property. How much of that public property generates returns to the benefit of the nation? Which set me thinking that if this was Venezuela we’d have nationalised the tuna farms ages ago. Instead we make do with a pittance of taxation on a product reared on public property and which incidentally leaves a nice oily trail on our seabed. Spiffin’.

Levante

Leaving nature and the seabed behind us there’s still things political going on in this island of Don Camillo and Peppone. News of Sliema’s young mayor being locked out of his own council’s emergency meeting made the headlines this week as yet another mayor seems to have to deal with a mutiny on his hands. This follows hot on the heels of the Fgura incident where another young mayor was sidelined by his own party – supposedly for his own good. Are the young studs of the PLPN stables finding the kitchen too hot to handle?

Meanwhile in Zebbug it was not the mayor making the headlines but the parish priest. Father Daniel Cardona erected a temporary billboard (we assume it is temporary for there is a temporary indulgence of 21 days from the requirement of Mepa permits if a billboard has a socio-religious function). The infamous quote of Malachi 2:16 has now become “God does not want divorce” – to which the obvious answer should be “God has no vote”.

bert4j_100725

Now I have no problem with the Catholic Church or members thereof airing their opinion publicly about the best future of civil legislation on the institute of marriage and its possible dissolution. As any other member of this open society of ours, and as one which has long influenced its staggered progress towards the future, the Church too has a role and understandable influence on what happens in our society. Which does not mean to say that its “catholic” and universal elements still hold automatically. If the civil debate on whether or not to allow divorce should centre around the issue of whether deities approve of such dissolution then we might as well resort to augurs and the slaying of goats on altars as we read the signs in their entrails.

This is proving to be hard to explain to the weak-willed believers who are unable to come to terms with the fact that the availability of divorce does not perforce mean that they themselves will be forced to avail of it. I should hope that we will not get stuck discussing the finer elements of divination while ignoring the more secular of arguments that should be relevant to this discussion. Once again J’accuse laments the fact that the only party with the balls to take a definite stand on the issue of the introduction of divorce is the one that has been effectively ostracised by the voting population. Such is our ironic predicament. Bring on the cohabitation Bill – there seems not to be a Malachi quote to tell us of God’s will on that particular issue.

Libeccio

I’ve left the worst wind for Gozitan commuters for last. I didn’t spend enough time on Gozo this time round and must make amends as soon as possible. Last Sunday though I did get to eat at one of Gozo’s best kept secrets. Il-Lantern restaurant at Marsalforn (part of the guesthouse in Qbajjar Road) serves what is probably the best rabbit spaghetti and stew in the whole of the Maltese islands. A footballing buddy of my youth, Rafel, braves the heat of the kitchen to provide you with a five-star homely stew fit for the palate of a king. Don’t expect refined silver service – it would not befit the ambience – but do expect a welcoming smile and good hearty food that your grandma would enjoy without batting an eyelid. Sunday visitors can also buy the Indy on the way in.

It’s been a fun break back home packed with sun, food and sea. It will be hard to slog back to Mitteleuropa where the winds are known to reach over 120 km/h and where most concerts and activities are held indoors in magnificent theatres but a man needs to get bread to the table. Even if most of it is gluten free. I’m over and out from Paceville, Saint Julian’s, Malta.

www.akkuza.com returns to Luxembourg by Tuesday. Back to basics and blogging for Malta’s longest-running source of indy punditry.

This article and accompanying Bertoon appear in today’s edition of The Malta Independent on Sunday

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J'accuse : Traffic

Traffic is an interesting phenomenon. The paths of a multiplicity of freethinking vehicle-driving individuals possessing varying levels of intelligence quotients converge for a short period of time as they attempt to negotiate their own way from A to B. For a short time these paths converge and the momentary confusion of priorities and interpretations on the best way to move forward can have observable scientific consequences that have often been the object of academic study.

Most times, just like magic (and thanks to a prudent observation of a basic set of rules), the result is a constant parallel movement, such as is observable among the shoals, packs and prides of the animal kingdom. Other times, due to a myriad factors beyond the control of the group as a whole, a sinister event occurs: the momentum is lost, the various components slow down to a standstill and before you know it you have what we call a “traffic jam”.

Observations of traffic movements have shown that the so-called “butterfly effect” (sudden slowing down causing stoppages further back) can be initiated by a single abrupt manoeuvre (sudden swerving or readjusting of direction) without any actual accidents having happened. On the other hand, when a truck’s jib hits a pedestrian bridge above one of the main arteries on a small island, what you get is not a butterfly effect but a national disaster that is almost equivalent to the much feared “gridlock” in large cities.

One particular bit of news that struck me from the reporting of the Triq Aldo Moro accident – apart from the four hours it took to resume normal service – was the observation of the negative effects of egocentric drivers who put their plight above everyone else’s with the result of increasing and worsening the congestion. It reminded me of particular drivers in Malta who are eager to overtake to win those extra 10 metres towards their destination – as though having overtaken one more driver would make a world of a difference.

I have often thought that given universal automated cars limited to travelling at speeds of 40km/h Maltese traffic would be much more efficient than it is now. But that would mean foregoing the right to be individual oafs of the road… Can you imagine? After the hunters (or part-time farmers) all we need is a drivers lobby!

Congested skies

Another kind of traffic is still dominating the headlines worldwide. The ban on flying that started with the eruption of the unpronounceable Icelandic volcano has been lifted. As the dust settles, the continent examines its original reaction and tries to fine-tune its plans should a similar event occur in the future. The “prudence v money” argument is a no-brainer for me. I would rather be stuck on the ground than hurtling towards it at breakneck speed thanks to multiple engine failure thank you very much.

It’s not just that. It’s also the fact that given the reluctance of certain airlines to grant consumers their basic rights, I’d rather not think of what other penny-pinching schemes they come up with in order to scrounge on costly security checks. The Ryanair conundrum was a particularly amusing scenario this weekend (at least for those who did not have to fly with them). You see, the inspired flawed-cost airline decided to inform all of its stranded passengers that it only felt obliged to reimburse them with the full cost of whatever they had paid in the first place. No hotel bills, no feeding costs for Ryanair. Only the €4 (or so) that you paid for the ticket. There’s an eye opener if ever was needed – you get what you pay for with Ryanair. Nothing less. Nothing more.

Mass repentance

Every cloud has a silver lining and Pope B-XVI’s visit will not, after all, be remembered for the early reactions to an artistic decoration installed on a traffic roundabout. Instead, the Pope’s stay in Malta has echoed all over the world for the unscheduled visit with the victims of abuse. On mediatic terms this was a winner for Malta – it is comparable to the Bush-Gorbachev visit in 1989 that was a crucial step towards the end of the Cold War. Benedict XVI’s visit gave a human, repenting face to an institution that still has a lot of decisions and answers to give but that showed these first steps in his “meeting in Malta”.

I cannot stop repeating that the Roman Catholic Church is not a democratic institution and that people inside the Church (let alone those outside) cannot expect it to change its ways on a referendum style basis. On the other hand, there are some consequences of the actions of members of the Church (with a big C) that cannot only be dealt with within the institution.

I am not one to judge whether priests should be celibate or – that is a question of faith. I am even loath to create links between celibacy and the atrocious stories of abuse we have heard. What I definitely feel well positioned to judge – as a lay citizen – is the civil and criminal responsibilities of whoever commits such atrocities. No Catholic Church authority, or any other religious authority for that matter, can substitute itself for the law. Ecclesiastic immunity ended a long, long time ago.

Third ways

Most times, when you are stuck in a jam you desperately look for a way out. While it is not always possible, sometimes you find that you can take the long way faster. European politics seems to be heading towards a sort of impasse. Government incumbents are burdened with a track record tainted by recession and blockage. The natural oppositions seem to be all opportunistic talk and no substance – of the “same, same but different” type. The instability of this “crisis” point is leading to the surfacing of more and more third way alternatives. Witness the Clegg phenomenon in the UK and the threatened split by Gianfranco Fini in Berlusconi’s PdL.

It may be early days but we may be about to witness the first reactions to the fact that duopolistic politics for the sake of duopolistic politics does not really work. It will all boil down to voters’ changing habits (in the UK – for now Fini will criticise from within, but for how long?). Are there enough elements to provoke them away from their habitual voting patterns? Will the “either/or” formula still work for much longer? The Internet and new media might hold the key to open new doors in participative and representative democracy.

Blog traffic

Traffic on J’accuse slowed to an abrupt halt this week as I went on a happy trip of pushing the wrong buttons risking the very existence of www.akkuza.com in the process. Thanks to the hard work of net-savvier colleagues of mine (thanks Simon!), the world as we know it was saved and J’accuse is back up and running. In this edition of the Independent on Sunday you will also find a page of posts from the TH!NK3 competition. They are a sample of the hundreds of blog posts from around the world discussing the UN Millennium Goals and the Development World. Do check it out and if you like what you see go to www.thinkaboutit.eu for more.

Speaking of traffic, it turns out that the man who had been pointing fingers and playing the victim in 2006 had been busy generating a high traffic of phone calls to referees and the like. Massimo Moratti’s Inter-cettati have been on a roll since they fed off the carcass of the World Cup Winning Juventus team (10/11 players in Italian squad) in 2006. Every “achievement” of the past four years must be seen in the perspective of their having neutralised their opponents off the pitch.

Inter-cettati might feel happy to have legal prescription on their side but that only means that rather than pay for their deeds as Juve have done, they will have to live with the stain on their “achievements” – give me Serie B any day than a scudetto or Champions League won with the sweat of hypocrisy and strength of jealousy.

www.akkuza.com is up and running again. We are now also twitter compatible – highlight your fav quote from j’accuse and tweet it. It also works on mobile phones – so you can do it when you’re in your next traffic jam!